Whole 30 Day 22

We are sooooooo close. Almost done. I can practically taste the ice cream now.

Like I said before, the premise of the Whole30 Challenge is 30 days of a Paleo-ish diet.

After 30 days the idea is to reintroduce each of these eliminated foods one by one so you can gauge the effect it has on your body because it's pretty common for people to have intolerances to these foods and not even know it, causing inflammation, digestive issues, weight retention and a bajillion other things. But, some people DON'T have these intolerances. So, this is an experiment on my body to find out what's right for me instead of my head spinning, trying every new fad diet.

My last update at Day 10 wasn't really very optimistic. I was beginning to get over my major sugar cravings but I was burning out. I eventually identified that I was getting burnt out on COOKING, not on the diet. It's hard to cook all your meals from scratch and work and go out of town every weekend. ESPECIALLY if your boyfriend isn't doing the diet with you. My recommendation would be to figure out some kind of bribery or brainwashing for you boyfriend before you start so that you two can do it together.

I still don't love cooking but I'm all kinds of die-hard about this diet now. Partly because I'm liking the energy and weight loss and all of that, but the bigger part is because on day 15, I ate some chicken that was covered in a cream sauce. I scraped most of it off but was like, whatever, I'm sure it'll be fine to have a TINY bit of dairy on day 15, mostly because I couldn't leave the office for lunch and this is what was catered. And OMG. Oh. My. God. You guys. My body was so pissed. I thought I had food poisoning but the other people at work that ate the same thing as me didn't have any issues. I have been terrified to eat anything off plan since. I threw an english muffin on day 16 like it was on fire. So, while ice cream sounds great in theory, there are definitely going to be some nerves during reintroduction of dairy. But dire fear of off-plan foods definitely makes sticking to this thing a lot easier.

While traveling, I've brought some on-plan snacks but I will just go out to eat where ever everyone else is eating and order chicken and veggies. So, I'm sure I've been eating cooking oils & other seasonings that may not be on-plan but nothing so off plan as cream sauce anymore.

I've also not been playing by the Whole30 rule that says no 'paleo-fying' foods. It says not to make a paleo version of your normal, off-plan foods because it doesn't help you break that habit of craving them. But it's really, REALLY boring to play by that rule. I understand WHY this is a rule, and I did a good job for the first half of the challenge but whateverrrrr I'm just going to eat my stupid panfakes and be so happy and satisfied in the morning and feel absolutely no guilt.

I have gone to all the parties and bars and weddings I normally do this month but I've ordered coffee or soda water with lime. And, I'll tell you what, I'm having a bit of a sober revelation! I feel great, I'm not bloated or dehydrated at the end of the weekend... there might be something to this! Am I growing up? *shudder*

Overall, I'm really, REALLY glad I'm doing this diet. Before I started, I made a list in my Notes app on my phone of nine things I hoped to get out of this experiment; symptoms I was having that I hoped changing my diet would cure. I wanted to wait until the end of the challenge to evaluate the success on that list, to be fair to the challenge, but I'm really excited about the success I've already seen on one of them. Before this challenge, I would get shaky, dizzy and nauseous if I didn't eat often enough. This happened usually once or twice a week. If I found myself out shopping or traveling and I wasn't able to eat every 2 to 3 hours, I'd feel like I was going to pass out. It sounds so dramatic but it's true. And I'd usually cure those symptoms with my go-to snack - a Snickers bar. Now, I guess I'm getting the actual nourishment I need because I haven't had that kind of thing happen to me for weeks. And I honest to God think I was having crack-addict-esque sugar withdraws! Crackhead withdraws mixed with inordinate amounts of espresso. No bueno.

I'm making decent progress on some of my other symptoms and I haven't seen marked progress on others, but overall, at day 22 I'm drinking the Kool-Aid. I get it, Paleofreaks. I feel good. And I say with almost a sense of stubborn pride that I STILL haven't worked out during this Whole30 Challenge and I STILL am seeing weight loss. I can only imagine the kind of results I could be getting if I was able to make it to the gym on my lunch break instead of working blogging through my break. On Day 10, I was skeptical and pissed at the world. On day 22, I'm saying, I really don't want to ever go back to day 10 or day 1 or day -10. 

I'm really proud of the foods I've learned to cook throughout this, too. Here are some of my favorites.

These chicken nuggets

This coconut bread

These orange-blueberry almond muffins

These panfakes (except I've taken to adding a little vanilla to the batter)

Some blogs/pinterest pages that I've used a lot:

The Group X Food Pinterest Page

The Ascent Blog (The reason I started this challenge)

Stir It Up Blog

Paleolicious Blog

And just generally searching 'Paleo' on Pinterest and cutting out all the sugar replacements. Most of them don't need them to be delicious anyway.

C'mon... just give it a try! All you have to lose is a few pounds. And it's not 'hard'. It's just eating your vegetables. You're an adult. You can do this.

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It's Friday Friday Friday

First of all, ^this happened^ as I pulled in to the parking lot of the office this morning... so clearly it's going to be the greatest day ever. This song which is technically offensive only makes me giddy with joy because I think of the below YouTube video every time and laaaaaaaaaaaugh and laugh. Although, one time the song started playing at my baby cousin's high school basketball game during a time out and my SEVEN YEAR OLD baby cousin sitting with me in the stands started singing every word (what she thought the words were) to "Rap City Chick" as she called it and I was flabbergasted. And impressed. And horrified. And thrilled that she was such a little baller.

Even just the still shot of the video cracks me up.

Also snagged a picture of this this morning. Gross? Maybe. But it's become somewhat of a challenge. Just think, it's 7 Styrofoam cups NOT in a landfill somewhere! You're welcome!

A Canadian Study reports that playing the game Tetris can cure lazy eye. So... there's that. You can just barely read it on the ticker in that picture up there but I bet if you played more Tetris, you'd be able to read it just fine.

Jen and I went on a sissy date Wednesday to the mall and Target and while I thought this picture of her trying on workout shorts in the middle of Old Navy was so hilarious and made her look like a crazy lady at the time, now it looks like that's just what she was wearing. She used to embarrass me by trying on clothes over her clothes in the middle of the store, but now I do it, too. Dressing rooms? Ain't nobody got time for that!

LOOK what I saw at Target. That's right, folks! A BABY DRUG RUG! Would it make me just completely crazy to buy this just in case I have a little boy one day? I don't even have baby fever (today) but the idea of dressing my son up like a little stoner excites me to no end. (PS I'm absolutely buying it the next time I'm at Target)

On our sissy date, we also heard a girl talking to her friend and this is the nugget of intelligence we overheard, "Yea, it's just like... you go from bar to bar and drink a bunch and it's a fundraiser. You just like, binge drink for cancer. Well against cancer, not for cancer. It really sounds like fun" Hahahahahahahaha. Mmmm sorry, I'm not going to be able to make it. I'm going to a fundraiser FOR cancer that day. I'm a huge cancer supporter. (Just kidding, Cancer, you totally suck and I'll drink to help eradicate you ANY day)

There is a kid at work who gets coffee every morning and then has to walk by my office to get back to his cubicle and he carries his coffee like he filled it to the very brim. But it's not filled to the brim. He walks slowly and holds it away from his body at shoulder height... and it makes me smile. What a little weirdy.

I had my nails painted this color, I think it's French Affair by Essie, and when it started to chip, it reminded me of those pink frosted animal crackers. And every time I looked at my hands I would crave those animal crackers. #whole30problems #fuglycuticles

Got my new earring in my helix piercing. At one point D had a pair of needle nose pliers trying to get the teensy ball screwed on. Scariest moment of my April so far (okay, that's being dramatic. April has been a pretty scary month for our nation in general).

Sometimes K will lay down and Bella will drag him across the floor by their tug-of-war rope. I love watching them play. There's so much strategy and their games have rules and they're just such little brainiac puppies!

Hahahaha I love him for admitting that he does it, too! And I love that THIS is why he wishes I were around. To play the 'drank' game with him. 

Oh man. The other day the "Naggers" episode of South Park came on and even though I've seen it a million times, I just sat on the floor in the living room laughing for 30 minutes straight. So, Randy is on Wheel of Fortune and he's in the final round and the clue is "people who annoy you" and the letters pop up N_GGERS! And he keeps saying "uhmmm I don't think I should say that word... I can't say that..." but time is running out so he finally says the N word but it turns out that it was "Naggers" and it causes a national uproar and he has to literally kiss Jessie Jackson's butt to apologize. Also, Cartman fights a little person in this episode. Holy cow it's the funniest episode EVER. 

So, somehow South Park doesn't offend me at all but the other day, a radio commercial came on for Party on the Patio, a happy hour one of the radio stations sponsors at a local bar. The new thing has been "come on out and one lucky lady will win a new Coach purse!" and at first I was like, okay, that's kind of a cool, different spin on giving away free stuff and getting girls to what is normally a sausagefest. Sure. Why not? But THIS time the ad said "Come out and a brand new Michael Kors purse could be yours if you enter and win the Sexy Dance Contest!" and I was like WHAT?! My feminist blood boiled. Now a regular dance contest? Yes. I'd be the first one up there, roboting my face off. And guys could enter and win the purse for their lady friend... that would be a fun contest. But how objectifying and gross! Please get up here and shake your boobs and maybe I'll give you a bag to carry your self-respect home in?! You done lost your mind, radio guy.

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Be Happy - P

I saw this little saying on one of my blogs and it kind of shook me up. What makes me HAPPY and is there a way to do more of it? Because of my commute, I have a loooooong work day. I'm going to start focusing on spending my limited free time on increasing my happiness. Obligations, chores and stress are for losers. Today's 5 things are brought to you by the letter P! These are the things I need more of in my life. 

Painting - I get it from my mama. The walls of her house are like Everlasting Gobstoppers. Sometimes a girl just needs a change and what easier and more instantly gratifying yet non-committal way than painting a room!? 

Ohhhh choices, choices! :)

Purging - Getting rid of "stuff" to have room for perfect, special, important things. I err on the side of getting rid of something rather than keeping it 'just in case'. So far, I haven't regretted it. Some people may think of cleaning stuff out as a chore but I LOVE it.

Preparing - I'm a pro at getting REALLY excited about things. My desk calendar brings me a joy I can't quite explain. I like to see my weekends and evenings full of friends and family and date nights to get excited about. Planning gives me an avenue to channel my enthusiasm. Packing lists, price comparing, reading reviews, mentally picking out my outfits... I just love to be prepared!

Praying - Or meditating. Quiet. Stillness. Solitariness. Imagining. Considering. Appreciating.

Yes, please.

Peyton - Especially the way she kind of looks at me, deciding if she loves me or not, and then grins a little and leans and holds out her arms for me to take her. Oh man, my heart explodes every time.

Oh stop it, you cutie patootie!

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Weekend Update

Friday High: The crack/cocaine I'm pretty sure Texas Roadhouse sprinkled on my Dallas filet. I didn't feel like cooking and so D and I went on a mini-date for his birthday eve. I'm not sure how they cook their steaks... probably in a very un-Whole30 way... but I did. not. care. And yea. A chain restaurant steak was my Friday high. Work was a beating that day.

Friday Low: Not finishing the project my team and I were working on ALL of last week. It looks like this coming week will involve MORE drawings, LOTS more excel spreadsheets and LESS working on any of my actual engineering projects. Don't know how I'm going to meet any deadlines. Womp Womp.

Saturday High: Our relaxing evening of drinking and visiting with friends at the Overton Hotel, celebrating D's birthday. Lots of toasts (coffee, for me *sob*) and telling stories.

Saturday Low: We were late for the Spring Game! :( Which was partly my fault... I knew I'd lose my ever-loving mind if I didn't have breakfast before we hit the road, and there's no grabbing a granola bar on my way out the door. I literally stuffed my face with the rest of my roasted butternut squash because we were running late to pick up Cashley. I hate running late so I was all grouchy and snippy at D. Not a great way to start his poor birthday! But I pulled it together. I just needed to lay on the guest room bed and meditate for a minute.

Not running so late that I didn't take a picture of my squirrel cheeks full of butternut squash while running to the car with my makeup bag under my arm.

Sunday High: Making par on a par 5!!!!!! I've only ever made par on a par 3. I mean... it's not like I played consistently well for the whole round, but I strung 5 shots together when it counted! I was totally crushing it from the tee box but past that, I relied heavily on my hand and foot wedge.

Why is it that girls can laugh when they swing at the ball and miss 3 times in a row...

But when one of these guys doesn't hit the fairway with his drive, clubs are thrown, golf carts are kicked... like... you know you don't play golf regularly, right? You shouldn't be some PGA star... what were you expecting?

Sunday Low: Watching D get ready for his engineering conference this next week after we got home :( Wahhhhh I'm all alooooone. There's no one heeeeeere, beside me. Looks like there will be a lot of snuggling with K going on this week. And hopefully trying to new recipes, getting to the gym and c'complishing (anyone else a Kraddick Fanatic?) some projects around the house.

Laying down while D packs... I kept moving my arm thinking "oh, I'm blocking K's view fo the TV" but then I'd have to remember, he's a dog. He is not interested in the Heat v Bucks game.

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Festival Fever

I... like the radio. I like to hear the same songs over and over until I know every single word. I'm still not sick of Call Me Maybe, if that gives you some idea of where I stand on 'musical taste'. Today, about 40 minutes in to my hour long commute, I thought I'd finally figured out how to sing. Then I turn the radio down and listened to myself and, nope, I'm still completely tone deaf. I just like happy music and I like to car dance.

That being said, I wanna go to Coachella so so so so so bad. The experience would probably be wasted on me because I'd only know the REALLY popular artists but that's not the point. The real point of music festivals is obviously the festival clothes. Oh, festival clothes. How I desperately want a good excuse to go all out, head to toe QUIRKY with some festival clothes. The cheaper option would just be to get dressed up and go to a local concert, but I just want to be a part of the awesomeness that I see on WhoWhatWear.

So, while I probably know 10% of the artists at Coachella, I think I know 100% of the celebrities attending and exactly what each of them wore so far and I'm also kind of hoping they turn it up a notch this weekend because so far, it's been pretty safe-zone. I'll definitely geek out on Sunday and scavenge every picture I can find of the event.

My top three from last weekend were:

Vanessa Hudgens is clearly higher than a kite, rockin' what looks to be lacy pajamas as day wear but I love it. It just makes me so happy when I see her.

And Vanessa, Take 2. The giant flower is stupid but I am CRAZY about that top and, again, I'm pretty sure she was drunk when she put this together, but it's HAPPY. She's obviously ready to party.

A much more mild, mature take on Coachella, but I can't help it. I love Diane Kruger. She can do no wrong and if she lost the shearling jacket, I'd be even more in to this look.

Shut up Alessandra Ambrosio. We get it. You're super hot and the perfect little boho cutie. Have a seat.

But these are seriously the best looks I found from last weekend and Vanessa's the only one that wasn't a total snooze. If I were going to Coachella (and had Ambrosio's legs), this is what I'd wear:

First of all, I'd put on these boots and never take them off (seriously dying for these, not just for Coachella but for life. *sigh* please magically appear in my closet?)

Then the flower crown. Duh. But just an understated one.

Then maybe I'd wear this one day...

And this the next...

Then obviously a tasseled poncho mini dress...

And on a casual day, thigh high socks with a moto jacket...

And this by the pool...

Obviously this skirt with a denim top

And most definitely these pants with a white crop top...

And when all those clothes were covered in beer and grass stains, I'd put on this top with a pair of distressed jean shorts, stick a flower behind my ear and vow to never leave Coachella as long as I live.

Oh, please, someone take me to Coachella and let me live in weird festival clothes forever and ever?

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Dust Bowl Blues

I was a pretty good kid.

I got good grades and stayed out of trouble.

I studied hard and got my degree and got a good job and I work hard.

But this week was one of those weeks where I look around and ask myself, how did I end up here? I followed all the rules. I did what I was supposed to do. But this is just not what I imagined it would be!

My life is so...

Dangerous

Secluded

Dirty

Sterile

Disheveled

Casual (I wore Nike shorts and an Astros tshirt to work Wednesday because I knew I'd be in coveralls and a hard hat all day).

Today, I miss Houston. I miss the high heels, the fast walkers and the fast talkers, the fancy downtown apartment, the happy hours, the view from my 17th floor cubicle. I miss walking through downtown to meet a friend at a cafe for lunch. And I REALLY miss my Houston job. 

Don't get me wrong, I'm super blessed and I'm reminded of that when I drive around the block to drop my pup off at my parent's house, and get to goof around with my parents and kiss on my niece and giggle with my sissy, all before 7am on a random Thursday.

It's just... today I miss Houston. :( This too shall pass. 

It's okay though! Tonight D and I are celebrating his Birthday Eve and then tomorrow, we're heading to Lubbock in time to get to the Spring Game! YAY! That way we can pick out our season tickets and get a sneak peak at our boys before the fall. I'm so excited about it! Then, it's shenanigans Saturday night, golf Sunday, lunch and then coming home.

Happy Friday! Get crazy this weekend, kiddos! (but stay safe)

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Chivalry Gone Wrong

My Mel and I were talking about awkward chivalry this morning. She was saying that she's not a fan of the 'ladies on the elevator first' move. While I don't mind this one as much (although the first few times I felt a little like they were wanting me to test out the integrity of the hydraulics holding the elevator up) but I understand what she's talking about. Sometimes it's an awkward inconvenience that could have been avoided if the dude just evaluated the situation and was like, 'actually, I'm kind of in the way this time. It would be easier for her to get on the elevator if I just got in first and THEN held the door open'. "Courtesy" in general can get awkward real fast if you're not careful.

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not some feminist that hates chivalry. Not even close. I still get butterflies when D opens my car door for me and I'll yank a teenager by his ear if he doesn't give up his seat for an older person in a waiting room. But there are a few niceties that we as a human race need to agree are officially too much.

• Mel would like a ban on the 'Ladies First Always' elevator hold.

Hahahahaha I'm going to start giving her photo assignments more often! These are hilarious.

• I personally would like a society agreement that 10 feet is the maximum door-holding distance.

• Never have I preferred a term of endearment in the workplace over my own name. Not that it really gets under my skin, but it almost always catches me a little off-guard. Unless you are over the age of 70 and then I can't help it. You can call me "sweetie" or "hun" all day and I'll eat that up.
• Apologizing for cursing. OMG how I loathe this. Your cursing doesn't effect me one bit. I mean, yea, the way you speak will effect my opinion of you as a person, cursing or not, good or bad. But get over yourself. I've heard all those words. If you choose not to curse in front of me because I'm a lady, that's pretty cool, but I honestly don't PREFER it over a guy who speaks kindness all the time but cusses a little. And if you choose to curse with reckless abandon but it's not in a degrading or hurtful way, I won't think any less of you at all. In moderation, in front of the right audience, I won't even NOTICE you're doing it. But you don't get to have your curse cake and eat it too. You don't get to curse and then get the chivalry points with a "pardon my language". Sorry, bro. And if you do it more than once, I can't just let it slide. I have to point out that you aren't some knight in shining armor gentleman saint because you apologized for cursing after the fact. This is my only REAL chivalry pet peeve. It is SO self-involved. Treat me like a lady or treat me like an equal, but don't treat me like a child. *sigh* ok, sorry, end rant.
• Actually, no. Not end rant. While I'm ranting, but on an only mildly related topic, do not tell me to smile. By all means, I welcome attempts to evoke a smile. Some polite small talk, a joke or something of the like? But should someone I don't know give me a "oh, c'mon, it's a beautiful day, how about a smile?" while I'm, say, sitting in a Starbucks waiting on my coffee, writing out a grocery list, so help him God. I have a range of thoughts and emotions, good sir, and not all of them result in a stupid grin plastered on my face all day. I was not put on this planet to be my most visually appealing at all times to all people in all the land. And I know. It's harmless. It's really an awkward guy's way of starting conversation. He's not meaning to insinuate I'm anything less than someone he wants to talk to and most guys have never thought twice about it. But when you do think about it, am I crazy to think it's SO self-involved and belittling? Okay, now really. End rant.

Let me reiterate, chivalry is still super cool. These are the only ones that seem to have gotten out of hand, in my personal opinion. For the record, guys (because I'm just sure a bajillion GUYS are reading my blog), pulling our chair out, paying on the first date, walking street-side on a sidewalk, us girls still eat that up. Please never stop. When you're a gentleman, it holds us to a standard of acting like a lady. And vice versa. Can I get a amen?

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Whole30 Day 10

I am 1/3 of the way through my Whole30 challenge. I haven't really written much about it because it's kind of confusing and boring at the same time, AKA the worst blog topic ever. Also, I seriously doubted I'd stick with it even this long.

The rules are laid out in In Starts With Food, the book I mentioned yesterday. It's just a strict Paleo diet for 30 days.

Also, no beans, legumes, grains, corn, or booze. And let me reiterate, NO SUGAR. At all. For 30 days.

I accidentally drank half sweet/half unsweet tea on day 6. It's just what I always order so I didn't even NOTICE I had drank it until after. On day 7, I tried a corner of one of the cookies Ashley brought over not on accident. On day 8, I ate a piece of macaroni to see it if it was done or not. That was an accident. I've also been eating SunButter... I'm not 100% sure that's on plan but ignorance is bliss on that one. But I mean, overall, not bad! 

It's been sucky to say the least. I have a serious sweet tooth and breaking that habit has been painful, difficult and emotional. It sounds dramatic and that's because it IS dramatic. I have been laid up in bed in the evenings with headaches, nauseous, exhausted... I've cried at dog food commercials, because D went to the gym to play basketball, because I couldn't fall asleep one night. But I survived.

This bowl was just KILLING me my first week.

I made it through craving the candy/cookies/cakes by the end of last week. These last few days, I just haven't felt like eating anything. I'm beyond bored with the foods I know how to cook and when I do cook, I never finish the food on my plate. 

Breakfast is the easiest... although I'm almost always late to work because it's my favorite meal and I want fresh eggs every morning.

Lunch is the most boring. It's been a salad with whatever leftover protein I have. Lame.

Dinner is the most difficult because D isn't doing this challenge with me so I want to make something he'll enjoy, too. He swears he's cool with eating whatever I'm eating but I know better. 

But as of day 10, it is getting better. A little. Today, I had an overwhelming urge to do push ups. I definitely have a little more energy. Instead of falling asleep on the couch last night, I went outside and threw the dinosaur for K. That's progress, ya'll. Also, I've lost a few pounds and that's without working out. I haven't worked out AT ALL in a month. I should break the lazy streak tonight but I won't make any promises. 

I've read it's all downhill after day 14 so I'm looking forward to this weekend. At the same time, I'm bummed I can't drink this weekend! Not even my go-to DD drink of Red Bull! Granted, Sunday morning, I won't feel like death, so that'll be a nice change. And I would have been DD anyway, since it's D's birthday and he's going to be the one in charge of getting messy and entertaining us all (hopefully with a karaoke performance). 

So yea. That's my 1/3 report on the Whole30. In a nutshell, it kind of sucks, it's kind of boring, it kind of makes you cry a lot, I can see it's working, I'm glad I haven't quit (yet). I can't recommend it yet though. Maybe by day 30 I'll be singing it's praises like all the other Whole30 bloggers. Stay tuned. Oh, the suspense.

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